Tuesday, January 20, 2009

An Occasional Poem I Had To Write For Class

This is an occasional poem i had to write for class, it was about inauguration day. So if you could give me feedback and critique that would be greatly appreciated. Also if you could act like a teacher and give me a grade based on what i wrote, please do. That would also be appreciated.

Entitled – A New Day and a New Hope

An auspicious day this was, January 20th 2009
As the Bush administration ended, another stood in line
This time of darkness has ended, eight years of crime to be undone
A new light stands brighter now, together we will have won.

For past, present, and future stood on Capitol Hill
To see the torch of passing, the light of America’s will
We hope that yesterday’s sorrow, will not be tomorrow’s pain
This day has brought the new, cleansing of the rain.

The future is not one of easy passing, or even painless fights
But this day has paved a new road to the revival of America’s rights.
On January 20, 2009 there was neither black nor white, neither minority nor majority.
This day has brought America’s hope, and that is worth more than anything ever seen

3 comments:

Lachlann said...

Alter, i can see this in the papers, i mean the news paper.

its that good,

good work on your blog and great poem


-Lachlann

Skye said...

Brilliant poem. I'd give that an A+++++++++++++++++++++++++ LOL!

I better go hide the sweets I have to ease my throat before my grandad eats any more now.
He's already eaten half the packet! I only had two!!!
I've only the one packet with me aswell. Grr.... LOL!

Were you watching it on tv yesterday? I say everyone in school was watching it here when they got home. It was pretty good.

My granny kept going on the whole time about how Obama is a great speaker and how he was a great speaker in college 'cause he wasn't reading his speech off a page and he didn't have anyone telling him what to say yesterday.

Again, great poem!

The next time you make a video with Scourge for your band, please just play your guitar! That would be so cool!

Seriously, I have to go hide that packet of sweets now and this comment is a lot longer than it should be. LOL!

Fly on forever!

The Girl Who Could Fly

Salom said...

HA i say it gets an A++++++++++++++++++++++++++

wow if we wrote that we would get expelled for expression of oppinion